Alright folks, pulled out my dusty card binder from the garage the other day when I spotted that Optic Football hanger box I impulse-bought at Walmart. Figured I might as well chase the full set since it’s 2023 and we’re all suckers for shiny rectangles. Here’s exactly how this rabbit hole went down.
The Starting Mess
Cracked open that hanger box like a kid on Christmas morning. Dumped all sixty cards onto my kitchen table – instant regret when sauce stains threatened my Trevor Lawrence base card. Started sorting with greasy fingers: base cards here, parallels there, rookies in a shaky pile that nearly avalanched onto the floor. Realized I had three Justin Herbert lasers but not a single Trey Lance. Typical.
Game Plan Execution
First thing was checking Beckett’s online checklist against my disaster zone. Scrolled the phone with one hand while flipping cards with the other, nearly giving myself carpal tunnel:
- Checked team dividers (still missing Eagles defense)
- Hunted rookie parallels (why does Penei Sewell hide like he’s in witness protection?)
- Verified serial numbers (yes I actually used a magnifier for that)
Found I needed thirty-two cards total. Hit up my local card shop next morning looking desperate – which I was – and traded five duplicate Josh Allens for one Kenny Pickett Holo. Felt like highway robbery but whatever.
The Final Stretch
Still hunting that damn Mac Crusade Red Velocity parallel three weeks later. Almost gave up when my buddy Dave texts: “Found some junk wax at Grandma’s.” Turns out “junk” included my missing Mac card stuck to a 1991 Pro Set common with gum residue. Spent forty minutes with rubbing alcohol and cotton swabs making it presentable. Sleeved it while watching the Packers lose. Finally slid it into the binder – done.
Lessons learned: card collecting involves questionable hygiene standards and emotional damage from football games. Would I do it again? Already bought the 2024 blasters.
